About Us
Aren’t you a nosy little one? Come to learn about us? Well welcome.
Why do we exist?
Isn’t that the question we’re all asking in some form or another? What’s the meaning of life? Is there a god? What happens when I die? Well…
We actually have the answer to this one. We exist because we like coffee. Simple as that. And to be clear, we aren’t fucking coffee snobs either. I truly could not tell you the difference between most of those fancy espresso drinks. I just wanted coffee I could drink black. Like my heart.
Simple.
Easy.
Tastes good.
And just so we're clear, I’m not kink-shaming your coffee order. If you like some complicated latte with seven ingredients, that’s great. Just don’t expect some big elaborate coffee knowledge from me.
Who this coffee is for
This coffee is made for people like me. People who drink coffee because they like coffee. People who don’t want a lecture about tasting notes. People who just want something strong and good. I didn’t want to sell a product and pitch something that wasn’t authentic to who I am.
So for better or worse… you get what you get.
And I do apologize in advance for the emails you may receive.
This isn’t a gimmick
To be clear… This isn’t some gimmick bullshit. The coffee is number one.
Everything else is just stuff that makes me laugh. The cult jokes. “Drink the fucking coffee.” The weird tangents.
That’s all just an extension of who I am as a person.
I wanted the opportunity to be unapologetically myself.
Why we donate
We donate to the Immigrant Legal Resource Center because I think it’s important to help people who are just trying to exist. That’s really what it comes down to. I know it’s a small gesture.
But it’s my way of telling the man to shove it up his ass.
We help people in our communities.
We support the people who represent what America should actually be.
So yeah…
This is a little peek behind the curtain. This is CAFFIEND.
If what I’m doing here bothers you…Then we probably aren’t for you. And that’s okay. No need to send me an email telling me you didn’t like that I said fuck.
Cool? Good.
For the rest of you…
Buy the fucking coffee.
— Nicholas P.